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Tuesday, December 7, 2010

SCBWI - Clicking the button is like saying it out loud




I’ve been thinking about it for a long time. I’ve looked at the website. It seemed like it was time to make a commitment. And so a few weeks ago I did it. I joined the Society of Children’s Book Writers & Illustrators (SCBWI). It is true that anyone who wants to support children’s books can join. As a school librarian I already had all the credentials I needed to join.

Still, while it felt exhilarating and exciting, it also felt scary. I could sign up as a librarian and let it go at that. I didn’t, though. When I had the chance to check off

Author

Illustrator

Or

Other

I put a check mark next to author. Ever since I’ve been feeling like I told a whopper. I feel like a truth bender, exaggerator, like I’m playing fast and easy with the facts, like a snake oil salesman.

The other day when I arrived home, the package from SCBWI was on the table. The light fell across it and illuminated it. I felt as if I was reaching for the holy grail, as if the moment I touched it my life would be different. I felt as if the contact between my skin and the package would set a set of events in motion that would change my life forever. I looked down to see if I was still middle aged or whether I had been transported to the natural state of my being – garbed in robes of flowing silk and scads of lace.

Funny enough, I do feel like my life has begun a transformation. The transformation happens when you begin to identify yourself as being something. Writing is not something I hope to do some day, but an act I do now and have been doing. I may not be good. I may not be ready to share what I write, but I am writing. Unlike the vision, it doesn’t happen in a flash of an eye. Rather it takes it’s time, pencil lead, notebooks, computer files and plenty of words. 

4 comments:

Nick said...

Congratulations! That's awesome!

Dana Carey said...

Good for you, Lynda. I can completely relate to what you've said. Are we an author or illustrator or artist of any kind only if we've received outside validation? I feel like a fibber too but I've just read too many times that saying that one is an "aspiring" anything isn't concrete enough. Whatever!
SCBWI will be a great thing for you. I've just returned from our Regional conference (which I organized along with our RA) and it was great to be with people who share interests and enthusiasm.
Keep going, Lynda!

Anonymous said...

Welcome to the SCBWI. This is beautifully written and we are sharing it today around the SCBWI office--Steve Mooser

Lynda Shoup said...

Thanks Nick, Dana and Steve for your kind words and enthusiasm. I need to find time to actually read that package now and take advantage of the opportunities the organization offers.